BAKER'S DOZEN--11/18/04

WHAT ARE YOU THANKFUL FOR?


The Baker's Dozen, of course. It's the pancake on my bunny-filled world.

Reality television. Who has time to worry about wars and economic misfortune when we can be watch Gilligans eat bugs for money?

I'm thankful that I have not been killed by a lava lamp. (See http://www.jquinton.com/archives/002231.html)

The glorious rule of President Schwarzenegger is only four years away!

My pet goat.

That another year has gone by with no signs of the Ben Affleck - Jennifer Lopez Casablanca remake.

That everyone still thinks that the human skeleton in my closet was a Halloween gag.

The knowledge that in a mere two months, there will be elections in Iraq and peace and stability will at long last blossom in the Middle East.

Julia Robert's successful delivery. Let me tell you, I have been on pins and needles for the last eight months!

I'm thankful for Hellcow answering our questions on the WotC boards.

My homeland security blanket.

Being able to stare at CGI bosoms and not feel like Sister Marie Therese can make me feel guilty about it.

I am thankful to be part of a true meritocracy, where family connections and shady deals take a back seat to talent, integrity, and hard work. That's right: I'm on the next season of The Apprentice. 

The power to cloud men's minds.

Steve Madden posters in the subway, speaking of unnaturally proportioned fictional babes.....

That the last four years went by so quickly, leading me to hope for the same with the next four.....

The Trailer for the new Star Wars movie! Who knew that the bumbling George Lucas would so accurately foretell the death of the American Republic and the Rise of the Empire?

The fact those raccoon wounds finally closed up.

That I am English

King W the Second (Part II) - A tragedy by William Shakespeare. Hey, if you're gonna have some art you've gotta break some eggs. Capishe?

Bush's reelection. It is mete before the lord that we Amish dictate the policies that govern the entire flat earth.

That a majority of the people in MY state voted the non-Fascist ticket!

For a lite beer that tastes great but is less filling . . . . . And TWINS!

That my nostalgic memories of a great America- filled with peace and prosperity, and presided over by a good leader with a grasp of English - will remain unsullied by any peace or prosperity for the next four to one hundred years.

I am thankful to have come out of the coma I went into when George Bush was crowned, er, uh, handed the presidential race. Who woulda thunk there were that many stupid people in the country? I guess this is all a part of their dumbing down of American society, having started many decades ago with the underpayment of teachers. Then the bought-and-paid-for media did their part, and next thing you know a known theif, drug user, liar and idiot is elected president just 'cause They say so. Oh, but I'm supposed to be thankful? Right.
 

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